Sometimes I Cry

Do you have that trusty place?

A place that you can go-

When feelings get so strong

and it’s about show?

You see- I prefer a stairwell

where the foot traffic is low

Where I can let it out

but I don’t want the world to know

I know that crying is good for me

but I’d rather people not see

So that is why I seek

the stairwell just for me

But sometimes when I cry

the tears they just won’t stop

The domino effect arrives

and now I cry for something else.

Sometimes when I cry

when my blood sugar is high

but sometimes when I cry

that’s what my makes it go high.

Sometimes my emotions

have gone too far to keep them in

I cry for the sadness

I cry for the anger

I cry for joy

I cry for the exhaustion

I cry for the blood sugar roller coaster

I cry because I’m anxious

But you see- when I usually cry

it’s because I’ve had enough

or a memory hits me like a wave

that just won’t stop

Sometimes I cry for the logistics of life

from a burnout of a different kind

Sometimes I cry for the expenses

or when I feel like I just can’t win

Sometimes I cry on the phone

with an insurance or medical company

Sometimes I cry at the doctors

because it’s all built up

Sometimes I cry because

I wish the diabetes didn’t come to play

Sometimes I cry during my period

and emotions are at a high

Sometimes I cry

when I remember the judgement and the past bullying

Sometimes  I cry about fathers

because I truly do miss mine

Sometimes I cry for the loss of a family connection

that I just have never really had

Knowing they do not understand me

or really haven’t treated me well

Sometimes I cry because my confidence is low

and my self-esteem is poor

When I keep repeating those words that I’ve heard as well

and forget that they aren’t true

Sometimes I cry in the subway

or against my bathroom door

Sometimes I cry to the family I have found

because they know me well

You see it’s okay to cry

it’s often what you need

whether by yourself in a stairwell

or with the ones you need.

Hey you! Yes, you! 

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We’ll both be glad you did! -Mindy